The Big 4O!

Can't escape it, not anymore! It's here! Well, it will be in a week - exactly 7 days from now - I will enter the 4th decade of my life!! When I think in terms of decades - the number still seems small :P
I mean 4 vs 40...come on - work with me here ;)

Seriously speaking - don't think it will be any different than turning 24 say or 37, or any age, for that matter. I thought it would - honestly, I was prepared for some earth-shattering insights into the world, humanity, my self! No such luck! The world, humanity and self all continue to feel and act much as they did when I was 37 - except of course the US just elected a black man to be President ;)
Aah...maybe this is a watershed year after all :P

No complaints though - 2008 has been a fantastic year :) Have had two 'fantabulous' trips each - to Europe and the US, work has been rewarding, friends have been supportive and family, loving! And now, here I am on the threshold of a new beginning - a time of change as I prepare for a new and challenging role - that of a mother. It's one I'm unused to and didn't particularly hanker after. One that made it's way into my psyche, gradually, hesitantly, cautiously. And yet, now it seems firmly entrenched in my heart and soul - am nervous but not panicky, well not yet anyway!! Maybe when the toilet-training begins - my friends have been very helpful - painting vivid pictures :P

And so I guess for me, what they say about turning 40 is true in a way - Life begins at 40 - and so it will for me - or at least, it will take off in a new direction, one that I am looking forward to :)

All this fuss over turning 40, got me to thinking about Life in general and decades in particular. Isn't that what everyone that's turning 40 is supposed to do? Ponder their life so far and plan for how they are going to make it more meaningful in the future? Well I'm not one for introspection - maybe it's cause - all things considered - I've had a pretty great Life! Don't really have any major regrets - that's not to say that Life hasn't been tough, yes it has, but nothing I couldn't handle with the love and support of family and friends.

Speaking of decades, my first was fabulous - had a dreamy childhood, especially the 4 years spent in Japan, where I was first introduced to cartoons and colour television - Kid Heaven! The Teen years were, for lack of a better word, 'typical', full of angst, mood swings and craziness - my Mom will agree - made her cry many tears, I did! Sorry Mom! Through it all - managed to get through 5 years of Medical school, make the 'best friend' a girl could possibly have and find the 'love of my life'! Not bad for a crazy teen huh??!! The twenties were more of the same - got married to the 'love of my life' though, amidst all the craziness :) In the thirties at last I felt like I had a handle on Life. The craziness was tempered by the small amount of wisdom I had acquired thus far and I began to see a faint light at the end of the tunnel. And now, at 39, in the last year of what has been my favourite decade so far, I can honestly say that I like myself more than I liked myself at any other time in my Life!

Those who know me best, know that I am shy and reserved, even when I seem to be having a ball, that I am perfectly happy to be alone for days on end, that I avoid giving advice like the plague if I can help it(though some of it is pretty great!). that for all my bluster, I lack self-confidence and am not half as brave as I pretend to be, that I still find it hard to start conversation with a stranger and that I love dogs and books infinitely more than I will ever love people!

Since moving to Singapore, I like to think I've gotten better at some of the above! I've started working as an editor, a job that allows me to work with my first love - Books! I truly enjoy it and never in a million years ever thought I would be doing it! My confidence levels have improved and so have my social skills. I still find it hard to make polite conversation with people I dislike - but on the bright side, I don't find the 'need' to be nice to too many people! And I still love dogs and books more than people - but I'm more patient with some humans ;)

I guess what I mean is - I'm just more comfortable in my own skin :) Some people feel the need to grow a new skin when they reach milestones - me, I just like to give the old one a little wiggle now and again, so it fits better! Works for me! It feels right, fits like a dream - a perfectly tailored custom fit! I'm going to hang on to this feeling - I like it and I think it likes me right back - makes me a better person, a better friend, a better me!

And so it's refreshing to think that the 40 years I have walked this planet have not been for nothing! It's been an amazing journey - all those years of memorable and not so memorable moments, lessons learnt, goals achieved, friendships made, love given, love received - I have had all of that and more. Even though I haven't changed the world in a big way, I have tried to better my own tiny universe and for me - that's enough. Life is beautiful - more than I ever imagined possible, more than I thought I deserved...and I am grateful, very grateful to all those that have enriched it with their presence :)


So there...Bring on the big 4O - I'm rearing to go!

Dear Mr.President...

Dear Mr. President,

Congratulations, to you, your family and your country on your historic win! You did it! You finally did it - now the world can breathe again and so can I! You had me worried there for a while - especially when Ms. Palin entered the picture and whipped up such hysterical media-frenzy. I have never seen so much fuss made over so little substance - but such is the world we live in today. Be that as it may, you did it, you did it, you did it!!! Sorry if I sound a bit hysterical myself, I am not - just Happy and Hopeful, well yeah, maybe a little!

For me, your election is one of the defining moments of our times, a full circle moment not only for every African-American but for every human being, simply because of the message it offers - HOPE & FAITH! There is still Hope in this crazy, mad world - and there is renewed Faith now, that every once in a while, us crazy people, are capable of doing the right thing! About time too! Wasn't born when JFK was assassinated and was a just a newborn when man walked on the moon, so am extremely proud to witness history being made today!

I know you're not technically the President yet, but you might as well be, given the governance that your country has suffered through the last 8 years. When you first burst onto the scene 2 years ago, I had never heard of you. Not many Americans had either I'm guessing - and I'm not an American, nor do I live in the US. I'm an Indian doctor currently living in Singapore and my only connection to the US, besides family and friends that live there, is the tiny fact, that my spouse works for an American MNC - Procter & Gamble. So for me - the US economy collapsing the way it did is much more cause for worry than any wars your country chooses to fight, or not! I'm an Indian - wars and terrorism have long been a part of my life, whether I like it or not and I don't.

Something about you intrigued me. Maybe it was your warm spirit and personality, more so in contrast to Hillary's cold efficiency, or the fact that you share a wonderfully close bond with your family, or the dignified manner in which rose above the race issue and spoke only of America and Americans or that you ran a disciplined, positive campaign and surrounded yourself with a great team of advisers, that allowed me to believe you would indeed, make things better. I began to follow the campaign and your integrity and speeches floored me every time - not only the fact that they were extremely well-written (kudos to your speech-writer!) but also the way your eloquence made every word come alive! You believed in your message and that came through when you spoke.

You spoke of unity and change and sacrifice and working together in a bi-partisan manner to heal your country - and yes - I believed you! You came across as level-headed and calm, where your opponents seemed shrill and vindictive. I liked that you warned Americans of the tough road ahead, while still remaining upbeat and positive - cause it will be. A very tough road indeed, but if there is one thing I have learnt from my recent vacation to your fine country - it's that if anyone can make it happen - Americans can!

The days ahead will be challenging, to say the least, and I wish you the Best of Luck for the monumental task ahead. Surround yourself with a loyal, efficient team and most importantly - LISTEN, to your citizens and especially to your detractors. PAY ATTENTION - please don't sleepwalk through your terms in office like President Bush did. LEARN - there's nothing wrong in making a mistake but everything wrong in repeating them over and over.

As a global citizen, I look forward to a wiser, saner, renewed and recharged US of A under your leadership. Once again, please accept my Congratulations on your historic victory! And now all that's left to say - Carpe Diem!

With warm regards and best wishes,
Dr. Harsha Priolkar.

P.S. When in doubt consult Michelle! A huge part of the reason I believe in you and like you as much as I do is Michelle :) Your choice of life partner assures me that you won't screw up completely! I have admired Michelle from the first time I saw her. For her poise and dignity, her intelligence and warmth and most of all for her mix of playfulness and gravitas! She's going to make one hell of a First Lady!

Gandhiji...

I'm not a huge Gandhi fan, never have been. To me, he's always come across as a stubborn, egotistical, selfish man (his vow of celibacy being for me the ultimate example of selfishness), who was often weak when strength was required and had favourites among his followers, just like us lesser mortals! I dislike the way, every time Independence is mentioned, we keep hearing Gandhi rhetoric and non-violence as if he was the only reason, India is today a free nation. Can we truthfully claim, India's Independence came through purely non-violent means?

What of all the hundreds of thousands of freedom-fighters that fought and sacrificed their lives, before him and by his side, anonymous and otherwise? Are Bhagat Singh, Azad and Bose and the countless others not as important? Were Nehru, Jinnah, Azad, Naidu and Patel not politicians of equal eminence in stature, strength and commitment? I believe they were. And yet, they are never given equal importance, rather always referred to as his followers, as if he were a saint and they his disciples! I get uncomfortable when human beings begin to deify one of their own! It upsets my rational self, I suppose! I think India would have gained Independence, with or without Gandhi and that's why this whole 'Mahatma' worship bothers me, more often than not.

It's not his fault of course. No, that dubious distinction belongs to us, the Indian people, and to our politicians, who have made Gandhi, big business! And that's what he has been reduced to these days - Big Bucks! Think of all the money people make, printing posters and commissioning statues! All the mileage, politicians derive out of garlanding those very same pictures and statues! Hollywood made Gandhi and Bollywood went one better, with Gandhi, My Father and the now legend, Lage Raho, Munnabhai!

Gandhi, My Father, was very interesting. I thought it explored very realistically, the troubled relationship between the Mahatma and his oldest son. I was relieved to see that the Mahatma was human after all and made mistakes. Also that he then refused to accept them like all of us do. Rather reassuring that! Lage Raho Munnabhai was a hoot from start to finish! I enjoyed it thoroughly, not only because of a sterling cast and performances, but also for Gandhi's characterization (Dilip Prabhavalkar was excellent!). He seemed 'real' and his ideals 'attainable'. A 21st century Gandhi, a common man's Gandhi! That, I understood, I identified, I rejoiced.

I do believe in non-violence though. Violence of every sort turns me off in a big way. I don't see the point of it and I know for a fact, it solves not a thing! A look around the world is proof enough for me. Man is the only animal on Planet Earth that engages in violence, purely for sport! For pleasure! Frankly it's beyond me - I have other ways of getting high and no they have nothing to do with drugs, sex or alcohol! Well - definitely not drugs! But it seems to me that though the man himself was non-violent and possibly never hurt a fly, his actions in combination with other events, certainly led to one of the most gruesomely, violent events in Indian history - the Partition.

I wonder, how and why a man so great, a Mahatma, has become irrelevant in society today. Yes, Gandhian ideology is still revered and being a Gandhi is certainly an achievement of sorts in India (beats me, as to why!), but seriously speaking - nobody gives a damn! Not the politicians who sing his praises and quote him at every rally, not the Indian people, for whom he was once 'Mahatma' and is now just another name in the history books and not me - though having said that, I did blog!

Hey Ram! Now that he would have understood...

Rock On!!!

Just back, from what for me, is definitely the "Movie of the Year'. I went with high expectations and the movie did not disappoint!

This movie really blew me away with its abundance of TALENT. The script and dialogue - fantastic, the acting - sensitive and controlled, the music - SUPERLATIVE, the editing taut, the direction - apt. A beautifully made movie to be savoured like a fine vintage! The last time I lost it like this over a movie was way back for Dil Chahta Hai - unsurprisingly, Farhan Akhtar's debut as a director! And here he is again - this time with his acting and singing debut - brilliant! Kudos to this young Powerhouse of Talent.

Yet for me the sensitive, angst-ridden Joe, portrayed by Arjun Rampal (looking HOT,HOT, HOT!!) in the performance of a lifetime, is the piece-de-resistance! He becomes Joe Mascarenhas - guitarist par excellence, dreamy, principled, protective and conflicted. Shahana Goswami as Debbie his wife, is the perfect foil to his down-and-out Joe. She's a no-nonsense kind of gal, who's sacrificed her dreams to work in the family fish business, put food on the table and pay the bills, struggling to keep her family afloat. In one of my favourite scenes (there are too many to count!) she's complaining to Joe, "I can never get rid of this damn fish smell from my hands!" Another is when she goes to meet Farhan's character Aditya, to tell him to stop 'spinning-castles-in-the-air' for Joe, 'cause what they need, is for him to have a steady job not unrealistic expectations. "The shards of those broken promises, will affect my life," she says, "my life and my son's, not yours. Please, let him go Aditya." Great scene, great dialogue, great acting!

Luke Kenny and Purab Kohli shine as 'Rob' the keyboard player and 'KD', short for 'Killer Drummer' :) Prachi Desai, whom I previously knew, only as the ever-suffering 'Bani' in the TV serial 'Kasam Se', shows she can indeed act and redeems herself as Sakshi Shroff, Aditya's wife and the catalyst serving to reunite the band, for one last Hurrah. I love the scene where she rather hesistangly, haltingly croons 'Ajeeb Dastaan Hai Ye', while husband Aditya watches, silently supporting her, eyes brimming with pride and love - very sweetly done!

The band is 'Magik', as its members say because, "We're all in it together!" I agree, it's all of them, together, creating movie-magic! This movie renews my faith in 'Bollywood', perhaps all is not lost after all and hope exists while such talent does. It's a good feeling :)

3 Cheers for 'Magik', 3 Cheers for 'Rock On', Hip Hip Hurray!!!

Happy Days...

Sorry this is not about the show - though I worshipped the Fonz - still do!!

Lately my days have been kind of a blur, happily busy with work and friends, until I realized that September is half gone! We're scrambling to get work ready for the Frankfurt Book Fair while not passing up on any opportunities to live it up, which leaves me very little time to blog ;)

Have spent several long days staring at computer screens, editing, trying to find the right words, thoughts, punctuation marks and others, having long relaxed lunches in the company of old friends - alcohol a must of course - wine, mohitos, margaritas - as a friend of mine likes to say - Jolly!!

Yesterday was particularly wonderful - a dear friend's birthday, nine women, stiff margaritas mixed by moi, delicious Mexican food and interestingly diverse conversation - all making for one long, potent celebration of the best kind!! Haven't had as much fun in a long while :)

As an Indian living outside India, removed from family with a manically travelling spouse - my girlfriends are my sanity, my lifeline, my raison d'etre! Life without them is unimaginable! We share laughs, cribs, books, jewellery and clothes! We give freely of ourselves - our homes, food, advice and ideas. Solutions to problems, shoulders to cry on and an extra pair of helping hands - we are all this and more.

A big Thank-you to all my Friends, for enriching my life, renewing my spirit and bringing me happy days!

I dedicate to all the Phenomenal Women who grace my life,one of my favourite poems, by Maya Angelou aptly titled 'Phenomenal Woman'...'cause that's what you are and that's how you will forever stay in my heart!

PHENOMENAL WOMAN

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

- by Maya Angelou

Girl Power!

Yesterday I attended Avril Lavigne's concert, here in Singapore, a part of the Asian leg of her 'The Best Damn Tour' and boy was it a Revelation!

I am not a major concert-goer. I've been to a couple (Santana and Elton John) courtesy a dear friend, and had a blast, but its not something I do by habit. Santana and Elton John are two all-time favourites and I know their music well. Avril Lavigne on the other hand is not someone I have followed at all, except for the occasional 'Girlfriend'. I knew she was a young teen Phenom and yesterday I got to see just why!!

The venue was full of young girls mostly between ages 9-12 (we ourselves had two aged 9 & 11) dressed in what I'm assuming are the latest teen fashions! Tights with mini-skirts, denim jackets, flip-flops, dark nail polish and pink hair-streaks! They all looked adorable! Many had Avril T-shirts over their outfits and almost all had pink and black flags to wave during the performance, as did we! None of these came cheap, but that didn't seem to matter!

The performance started an hour late and the children waited somewhat patient but fidgety, letting of steam through repeated collective chants of "Avril, Avril, Avril!" She came on at last at 9 pm and I was immediately deafened by the collective roar from thousands of screaming fans!! She launched into 'Girlfriend' and there was no looking back! My friend and I might possibly have been the only two people left sitting in our seats! Everyone else was on their feet - screaming, dancing and singing along.

Right in front of us, was a young girl (she couldn't have been more than 9 yrs old) in denim capris, an over sized black Avril tee and silver guitar earrings. She was obviously a huge fan and knew every word of every song that Avril sang, singing along with her, as did every other girl there including our two! It was amazing to see them sing lyrics, which they were still too young to fully understand and touching to see their devotion to their Idol :-)

Avril didn't disappoint! She was utterly charming, extremely pretty and wonderfully talented! I loved 'When You're Gone', 'Complicated' and 'Happy Ending'. For a moment the little girl's father and I made eye contact as we watched his daughter's joyful celebration in shared amazement and exchanged a knowing smile. In that moment I understood how she felt and I was right there with her!

'Go Avril!'

Lifestory

I wasn't thinking of anything or anyone particular, when this poem occurred to me, or maybe I was and just didn't know it! Now that I read it, I think I must have been thinking of my Mom & my Granny - both women I love and admire immensely but don't often let it show! Role models in every way. Women of independent spirit - wise, brave, opinionated, strong, kind, elegant and graced with dignity.

Aai & Mamma, this one is for you...

Lifestory

Today, I met a woman,
Her head bowed in grace,
Quiet eyes and gentle sighs,
Solitude lined her face.

I watched her move mountains,
Her back straight and proud,
Her long and restless fingers,
Often caressed my brow.

Marriages and children,
Family and friends,
Shadows on her gentle face,
Alone in the end.

Years of wisdom wrapped in love,
Journeying stormy seas,
Beauty and courage on wings of a dove,
Her spirit forever free.


- Harsha

Mabuhay!

She arrives Monday! My new live-in helper from the Phillipines. I have butterflies in my stomach and I don't mean in a fluttery, delicate way!! Oh no - more like giant moths - beating their wings with frantic energy, looking for a way out of a roomful of darkness and closed windows! I hate moths.

Why am I so nervous? I've never had a live-in helper in ALL of my adult life! The last time I lived with one, was as a college student, when Savita, a girl from our village came home and stayed with us until we married her off! She was family - in the manner in which long-standing helpers become family, irritatingly familiar and familiarly irritating! But that I was a lifetime ago, when I was young college student, immersed in my own world and oblivious to all else - certainly home and hearth were farthest from my mind!

Now however - I have metamorphosed into a rather house-proud home-owner. I like things just so, that's not to say I'm fussy or a 'dragon' in the home, but well, it's my house and I like things a certain way! Surely that's not being unreasonable? But now that she will be here - touching my things, sharing my space & life - I'm beginning to wonder...will I cope? will she like me? will I like her? how will I deal with the loss of privacy? will she learn to cook? will she make my morning cuppa, just so? will she break my stuff? will I manage to be kind and firm at the same time? Scary stuff!!

Don't know the answers yet, only time will tell. It's rather like courtship really -tentative and confusing at first, each on tenterhooks - pondering the right words to say, the right tone to use. For now, I'm hopeful, getting ready to 'do the dance!'

And so I say to her...Welcome,"Mabuhay"!

* After I wrote this, I came to understand that she has not cleared an essential English exam and must go back to the Philippines before she can come back and take the exam again. Though a part of me is relieved, another is sadly confused - despite all my misgivings, I guess I was looking forward to her helping hand!

'Fasting, Feasting'

The title, readers among you might recognize, as the title of an Anita Desai novel, a finalist for the 1999 Booker Prize. I've borrowed it because, having just got back from a magical reading of passages from the same by Anita herself, I'm absolutely 'floored'! Sorry, wanted to be very literary and use elegant language, but 'floored' just best describes how I feel right now, not delighted or fascinated or awestruck - although I feel all that too!

My dear friend (to whom I am eternally grateful!) had an extra invite to the event and since we're both bookworms, she took me along. I haven't read Anita Desai, so I had no expectations. I googled her to get a bit of background and not be the only entirely ignorant reader at the event! (God Bless Google!) That was the extent of my preparation.

The event was held at the Pod on the 16th storey of The Singapore National Library, a venue that was stunningly appropriate for the evening as it turned out. A wide circular room, with glass walls that allowed expansive vistas of the Singapore skyline and river. For once, I was glad for the rain that had thankfully petered to a light misty drizzle and as the evening progressed and the lights came on, contributed to the magical aura of the setting.

There were a few speeches to begin the evening, that I happily pass over and then at last she began to read. As I write, I can still hear her quietly forceful voice in my head. Not particularly loud, yet effectively nuanced and incisive. She transported me and the rest of the attentive audience, straight into Uma's world, minutes into the reading. When she read the passage where the protagonist Uma is on display to a prospective bridegroom - the whole audience was laughing! When she told how the same bridegroom asked for Uma's younger sister Aruna's hand instead of hers, we empathized with Uma's pain and disappointment, felt her mother's anger. Poignantly funny, I think we all recognized the Uma in ourselves, deeply hidden yet strangely familiar. I wanted her never to stop and I could see many around me similarly affected!

I will always remember her in black and white. A striking persona resulting from an elegantly dignified blend of her mixed parentage and wisdom, in a beautiful black and white mekhla, long silver earrings, with her silvery gray hair in a large bun and the glasses perched on her nose. I could gush on and on, about her simple yet emphatic language, her clarity of thought, her dry wit and her general poise and grace - but I think you get the picture!

I was 'floored' by the reading, borrowed my friend's copy of the book instantly and am off to read it right now!

"Happy Reading" fellow bookworms!

'Sanctuary'

Today was another one of those days, when I spent a zillion hours talking on the phone! My head is still spinning from all the talk (not that I didn't enjoy every minute!). Is that why I thought of a quiet space - a retreat, a haven, a sanctuary? I'm not sure - it just kind of came to me. I guess my 'self' knows what I need and when, better than I ever will!

So here goes...

Deep within my quiet heart,
Is a safe and gentle place,
Where I retreat to hurt and heal,
In my secret, personal space.

Here I am nurtured when I break,
Cherished, harboured from disgrace,
Here I find my missing sparkle,
In Love's warm, tender embrace.

Here my spirit comes to be tended,
Lovingly made strong and whole,
Here my soul comes to be mended,
Blessed, nourished and extolled.

In this blissful peace of mind,
I find my heaven, haven I find,
Solitude and benediction,
My sanctuary, My conviction.

- Harsha

Lightning Strikes Twice!!

Yesterday I watched in complete awe and disbelief as Usain Bolt smashed Michael Johnson's long-standing world record in the 200 metres. When asked before the race, whether he thought Bolt would break his record, CNN reported that Michael Johnson 'didn't think Bolt was ready yet.' And yet there he was - Mr. Lightning, making it look ridiculously easy, effortlessly relaxed - a Michael Phelps of the Athletics world!

What an ATHLETE!! And funny too - after winning, he pulled off his glittering gold sneakers (never seen anything like them before!), draped the Jamaican flag around that tall, sinewy frame and did his funky chicken dance - almost as good as the actual run if not better ;-) The crowd adored him and he obviously enjoys being in the spotlight! A born performer!

I had watched him set the track ablaze when he set a new world record in the 100 metres to become the 'fastest man on the planet' but then to do the double, let me channel Mr. Reshamiyya here, SUPERB!! AMAZING!! FANTASTIC!! MIND BLOWING!!

He ran the 100 metres in 9.69 seconds and the 200 metres in 19.30 seconds!! I mean what is 10 sec for Pete's sake? I get up in the morning and stretch for a whole minute before I can even contemplate moving, forget run anywhere! It got me to thinking - what CAN I do in 10 sec? Hmm....let me think...yawn - yup can do a 10 sec and a 20 sec yawn comfortably - in fact am pretty good at that! Wonder if they have an Olympic medal for yawning! Surf 20 TV channels -such a useful skill, believe me! Blink rapidly about 15 times (yes I really did time myself!) - very easy, entirely useless and utterly boring! Click my fingers 8 times, get the treadmill started - yeah, I think I can manage to do that in 10 sec...

Today he turns 22 - and what a way to celebrate! World and Olympic record holder in the double, the first man in history to break both world records at one Olympics, and the first man to win both the 100 and 200 metres events at the same Olympics since Carl Lewis in 1984!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR.BOLT - MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU!!

Confessions of an amateur gardener...

Let me confess straight up front that I do NOT have a green thumb. I've lost count of the many hapless plants I've killed over the years! Don't get me wrong - I don't set out with murderous intentions, but old habits die hard and after the first few weeks of enthusiastic watering, fertilizing and protecting with insecticides...laziness takes over with a vengeance! Everyday, I think to myself, 'I'll water them tomorrow. Plants don't need to be watered everyday anyways, they might die from water logging.' And 'Tomorrow' being what it is, never comes! I move on to more pressing matters, like watching TV, eating, sleeping etc...and by the time I remember to water them again, there they are poor souls ('coz really, how do we know they don't have souls!) starved to death, leaves burnt to a crisp, soil dry, all imaginary hopes of recovery on my part cruelly dashed!!

So there it is - I confess - I suck at gardening and now I have nowhere to hide! And yet, since I possess an abundantly optimistic spirit (friends and family have accused me of this over the years!!) I don't give up easily. This is not a bad quality to possess unless coupled with a slowness to recognize and accept one's faults. Together however, they can spell disaster! Since I suffer from this tragic coupling, it means I have to repeat my mistakes many times over, before I let go - and so the murders continue!! Did I mention I used to be a doctor??!

Well, in my spirit of never giving up - I went to a class on orchid-growing a year ago, all enthused and as always determined that 'This time will be different!' The class was great, actually fantastic, because I found a plant that was tailor-made for enthusiastically lazy gardeners like moi - the Orchid! Singapore's national flower needs very little watering, in fact it needs very little care of any kind :) I remember feeling hope bloom, when we were informed, 'This plant is one of the few plants that actually thrives if not watered regularly, once a week or even once in 10 days is fine.' 'Aha!' I thought, 'What could be better?'

And so I went on an orchid-buying spree - red, white, purple, the works!! A year of happy neglect later, I had managed to kill all but one tiny little orchid plant, which I assumed would never grow let alone flower. And yet, one fine day, there it was! A beautiful single orchid bloom on that tiny plant!! I was I must confess rather embarrassingly ecstatic and rushed to get the camera and take a few dozen pictures of the poor flower! Orchid blooms last a long time - a few weeks at least - and I gaze at it every day like a proud parent!

And now, I need to go buy some more plants! After all, my little flower could do with some company and I am nothing if not persistent.

This time Will be different!!

The New Big B! Really?

Thanks to Kaustubh for letting me know that 25 yr old Abhinav Bindra had won the first EVER individual Olympic Gold for India!! It came as a wonderfully unexpected bolt from the blue! I was ecstatic!

I wasn't watching his event - didn't even know it existed! Frankly, I didn't think India had any medal hopes, was really pissed off at the Hockey team for failing to qualify and so was caught off-guard! But now let me say, CONGRATULATIONS ABHINAV - YOU DID US PROUD!!

I like this young man - all of 25, he impressed me with his calm and self-assurance. It was as if his victory had been a forgone conclusion and not the result of a hard, well fought battle! His rather stoic appearance, brightened only by the broad grin on the podium! His sister later said in an interview, that he had always been a dedicated, focused, reserved sort of child, not given to open displays of emotion but determined to do his country proud in his chosen area of expertise. Well he certainly did! Here's to many more Days of Glory!

In true Bollywood style, the media was all over his house, his family, his friends, his hometown...interviewing all and sundry. As I watched Indians all over the country send in their Congratulations, I couldn't help wondering how long it would last - this euphoria of an Olympic Gold. Would it really make any dent in India's long-standing apathy toward a sport other than cricket? Truth be told - I don't think so. I did a little research on Mr.Bindra and he is not representative of the average Indian. He comes from an affluent family with the luxury of a rifle range in his backyard! Unlike most talented sports persons in India, he was not at the mercy of the sports bureaucracy that I often feel exists, only to confer awards on sportsmen and women who triumph despite them rather than because of them!

I remember a time when Paes and Bhupati were doing well in tennis, when Rathore won silver at Athens or when Narayan Kartikeyan and Sania Mirza first erupted onto the scene, there was much hope then that these sportsmen and their successes would spur the development of non-cricket sports in India, but I haven't seen that happen! Sadly, Hockey once a source of much pride and joy (still our national game for reasons unknown!) continues its abysmal decline in the face of much political scheming and in-fighting.

Why is it that in a country of 1.1 billion, only one sport is revered beyond every other, even when India is at best, mediocre at it? I guess - that is the million or shall I say billion dollar question! Why is it that India - once Olympic hockey champions are now unable even to qualify? Sport demands high levels of dedication and fitness from players but they also need modern infrastructure and sponsor support to train effectively and earn a living while doing so, since most athletes have short careers and are at a high risk of injury. I think China has shown the world, how it should be done over the last few decades and as a result been increasingly rewarded for their hard work and commitment to excellence in recent years.

While I hope that this latest Olympic Gold will indeed make a difference in the Indian sporting scene - my gut tells me that is unlikely. Public memory is fickle. This will most likely be another one of those 'flash-in-the-pan' events, much loved but soon forgotten and eventually relegated to dinner table chit-chat among sports enthusiasts.

This time, as before, I look forward to being wrong.


* Title inspired by Dr.U.N Gaitonde urf Mamaji!

China, Shining!

On the most auspicious 8th day of the 8th month of the 8th year at 8.08pm, Beijing kicked off the 2008 Olympiad with a 'GRAND EXTRAVAGANZA!!'.

Not being a very keen sports enthusiast, I wasn't really interested and when I heard that these Olympics are being hosted at a cost of upwards of US$40 billion, I was flabbergasted and critical of China. But, Friday night and nothing much to do - so we sat down to watch and boy am I glad we did!!

Where do I begin? The spectacular display of fireworks throughout the ceremony; thousands of drummers moving as one, every angle perfect, every note harmonious; the giant scroll unfurling on centre stage and dancers turning it into a work of art with their inked hands, while fairies (suspended from the heavens) moved serenely high above them. My jaws dropped watching the perfectly choreographed printing demonstration, while thousands of monks danced with their bamboo scrolls. Such perfect synchrony, had me convinced, the whole piece was mechanized - until lo and behold, at the very end, thousands of young men threw off their costumes and waved excitedly to the crowd!!

The list is endless - whether it was the vivid pageantry, the astronauts, the huge Globe with travellers circling it in mid-air, the maritime scenes with colourful rowers in ship formations, children singing and dancing, haunting music and scintillating lights - it was picture perfect!! The spectacular display took us down a journey of 5000 years of Chinese civilization in the space of 2 hours - and showcased some major Chinese inventions - gunpowder, ink painting, printing and the compass!

China's moment had arrived and how!! As I watched awe-struck, the last torch bearer, Li Ning, a famous gymnast rose majestically bird-like into the air, blazing a fiery trail until at last the Olympic Torch lit up in all its magnificent glory!! (Am in danger of running out of adjectives here!) The Bird's Nest stadium lit up like a jewel, in the light of the shining Torch and a multitude of fireworks! What an achievement!!

I remember Pramod Mahajan's campaign for the BJP in the last Indian General Election - 'India Shining'. Watching the glorious trail-blazing spectacle that Beijing put on for the world yesterday, I realized how far India has to travel to get to the 'S' in 'Shining!! We are so similar in so many ways and yet what a difference government makes! I'm not condoning the Chinese Government's dictatorial style of functioning nor their poor human rights record - but the fact is - they get the job done and yesterday they surpassed I'm sure, even their own high expectations. They certainly surpassed mine!

But it's the people that I most admire - for the true pride they have in their country and its achievements and the sacrifices they are willing to make to turn dreams into reality. In my opinion, India and Indians lack that - we too have a glorious heritage but not much pride in it, me included unfortunately. I expect the Government to do everything and then crib when it doesn't.

But the truth is - a country is its people. And yesterday's Ceremony was a testament to the persistence, hard-work, dedication and spirit of a billion plus Chinese - Hats Off China! Take a Bow!

Sugar & Spice!

This morning I spent two happy hours with a dear friend. While we caught up, her daughter and two friends played together as only 9 yr old girls can :)

These are the last few days before school begins and their single-minded focus on pleasure and enjoyment was delightful! They were excited and happy to be with each other and it showed! No pretense here! They sang, danced, watched DVDs, ate enormous quantities of food and squealed with joy while doing so! It was enchantingly refreshing! Girl-power at its sweetest best!

Watching them brought back fond memories of my own childhood (so long ago!) Oh to be that carefree and innocent again! I wish them many more such days filled with the innocent joys of childhood - song and dance, food and friends, parties and sleepovers, soft toys and bicycles, Hannah Montana and High School Musical...and yes a bit of school too ;-)

When I said goodbye, they were all cuddled up in my friend's four-poster watching a movie and a long-forgotten but familiar rhyme resonated somewhere within...

"What are little girls made of?

Sugar and spice, and everything nice,

That's what little girls are made of!"

...Indeed!

Choices...

Let me say at the very outset that I am pro-choice, so if you are not, maybe you shouldn't read further. On the other hand, maybe you should read on, to try and understand another perspective. The choice is yours.

And isn't that what life is all about really - Choices? When every human being has the 'freedom of choice', that, in my opinion, is true Freedom.

Two days ago, the Mumbai High Court struck down the Mehtas' petition to abort a 25 week old foetus that has a high chance of being born with a serious congenital heart defect that will probably compromise that entire family's long-term quality of life and perhaps the baby's very survival. The judges based their decision on the present laws in India (which disallow abortion beyond 20 weeks unless there is a proven risk to either/or the mother's and baby's life) and the testimony of medical experts.

Medical opinions during this hearing have been confusing to say the least! Initially they said chances of the baby's survival were slim at best with a pacemaker and major life-threatening surgery required and then they said there was not enough risk to either the baby's or mother's life to justify an abortion! I'm still wondering what the truth is!

Anyone that has trained as a doctor knows that medicine is at best an inexact science. Anything is possible, some things are more probable than others and nothing is absolute. Although science continues to progress rapidly, we are far from a complete understanding of the human body and in many cases doctors are rather like mathematicians, advising patients on probability and risk and since they are only human, mistakes happen. A complete turnaround of this sort however, just makes me begin to wonder at the 'expertise' of such experts!

I could not find the name of the exact congenital heart disease that the Mehta baby has (there is a wide spectrum) mentioned anywhere but from the descriptions offered in the media, it doesn't look too good for the baby or the parents. I am not a parent yet, however as a doctor and paediatrician, I understand how frustrating it must be for parents to try and make a decision when all they have are numbers - a 1%chance of this or a 5% chance of that. It is not a situation I would want to be in and I commend the Mehtas for the courage they have shown in making, what must be a heart-breaking decision and then for going about it in the proper legal way. I cannot say with any confidence that I would have had the strength and courage they have shown.

Given the medical opinions and the laws today, there could not have been any other verdict, unless the courts had shown foresight, but the Indian justice system is archaic and sluggish at best, certainly not progressive. Perhaps this case will serve as an impetus for change. The case was, as is typical in India nowadays, covered with a fiendish frenzy in the media. Since everyone with a brain has an opinion a vociferous national debate ensued, which in my opinion is the only good thing to come out of this mess so far.

I feel deeply for first-time parents, Niketa and Haresh. It is a trying time for them - handling the diagnosis, coming to a decision, dealing with the media circus and being judged by all and sundry. This episode has not only caused them grief in the present but has assured that they will remain under scrutiny for the rest of the pregnancy and certainly after the baby is born. The whole of India will now be watching their every move!

I have read a lot of comments both for and against the Mehtas' choice. I am pro-choice as I said in the very beginning and so I support Niketa Mehta's right to make her choice, any choice, right or wrong, is not for me to judge. This is a very personal decision based on their life, their beliefs and their recognition of their ability to deal with the consequences of that decision.

Since every situation is unique, it's pointless to argue with those who presume to understand what the Mehtas feel or are going through, unless they have dealt with a similar issue in their own lives. I firmly believe that you can never know how you will react in a crisis, let alone anyone else.

The Mehtas have been accused of everything, from being publicity hounds, to wanting to abort the baby because they found out it was a girl or because it is not perfect. Don't all parents dream of a 'perfect child'? Is there something wrong about wanting the best, striving for the best? As a race we are continuously trying to better ourselves and our world - I always thought that was what set us apart from animals!

Others say they have no right to make a decision on behalf of their baby - this I find laughable, simply because parents make decisions for their children all the time! I don't here any complaints when parents choose schools, colleges, friends, professions and even spouses for their children! Surely these choices change their children's lives profoundly and yet at such times I hear the phrase 'Parents know what is best for their children!' or 'You are too young to know what's good for you!' bandied around regularly! Why then the sudden change when the baby is still in utero? Do parents morph into evil, conniving, selfish beings during pregnancy, thinking only of themselves with no regard for the life they have created together?

I wonder, how many people will rush to help the Mehtas, if the baby is indeed born with the defect and has a poor quality of life? And I am not talking financial help -that's the easy part - I am talking volunteering time to provide the Mehtas much needed support and respite from the gruelling routine of looking after a special needs child. Not many, I don't think. And no, I don't see God descending from the heavens to care for them any time soon either! I have faith but I also believe 'God helps those who help themselves'.

I have a physically challenged sibling and it has dramatically changed the way we live our life as a family. Did we ask for it? Of course not! Are we dealing with it? Yes, to the best of our abilities. Do we wish things were different? Every second of every day. Can I imagine life without my brother - Hell No! The physical, emotional and mental stress of taking care of a special needs child, is exacting on their caregivers, especially in a country like India, where life is a daily struggle even for 'normal' people. It is a tough life with much joy yes, but also many concerns for the future. I know this concern is not unique to parents of a special needs child but they do have a unique set of problems to deal with, in addition to everything else.

Does that mean all parents faced with the Mehtas' situation will make the same decision they did - of course not! People chose differently in similar situations, driven by their own life experiences. But what is crucial, is that they have the right to make that choice without being publicly judged.

Some argue that had the Court ruled in favour of the abortion, it would have opened the floodgates to other couples who would then pick and choose the pregnancies they wanted to keep based on other more trivial criteria. Perhaps that is true. But in my opinion that says more about people than it does about the system.

In my career as a doctor, where I have seen 'loving' parents refuse to donate minuscule amounts of blood for their babies asking me to "Please buy some blood, doctor. We will pay whatever the cost!" I have also seen devoted parents caring tirelessly for their sick children.

The Mehtas' made a choice. In my opinion it was their choice to make. The only reason we are even discussing it today, is because they chose to do it legally and in the public eye. And yet, isn't that the whole point 'freedom of choice'? One size does not fit all and there is no right or wrong - just ordinary people, doing what they think is best at the time, to the best of their ability. Who can ask for more?

I wish the Mehta family strength, stamina and courage for what lies ahead.

Friendship Day!

Friendship Day is apparently celebrated on the first Sunday in August every year! I was of course blissfully unaware of this fact until my bro wished me. (Aseem what would I do without you ;) I got to thinking about it and realized I'm really not a 'Day' kind of person! I mean I have enough trouble remembering Birthdays and Anniversaries as it is - without adding on a whole other list of 'Days' to remember!

Don't get me wrong - I am all for Love & Friendship and my friends are very dear to me EVERYDAY!! I guess I'm just not the kind of girl that will send cards that say so :P Maybe it has to do with a combination of laziness, advancing age and the fact my failing memory rebels when I tax it with inane details ;)

Back, way back, when I was a kid - we didn't have Friendship Day and though Valentine's Day was celebrated it was nowhere near the circus it is today, stirring up political protests almost every year! In my time I guess political parties had better things to do than protest a celebration of Love! Growing up in Goa, I remember the annual 'Red and Black' dance held on Valentine's Day at Club National, was a popular event. But that was about it! And us kids just wished each other! Sweet and simple! No pressure!

Over the years, I've watched Valentine's Day became big business, followed by Mother's Day, Father's Day and now Friendship Day. I have no problem with the basic idea, which I hope and suppose is to honour people and relationships, rather with the commercial aspect that encourages one to buy that special gift, send that special card or feel like a loser! I admit, it may seem like an over-reaction, after all one can choose to ignore these 'Days' and go on with life as usual - but that can be hard to do with the crazy in-your-face marketing, especially for the younger generation.

Also, who decides these 'Days' anyways? I mean why should the first Sunday in August be Friendship Day? Why can't it be the last Sunday in June? What difference does it make? Most of these 'Days' are decided by gift and greeting card companies to increase their sales - and boy have they been successful!

If online websites are anything to go by, everyday is some this or that day!
I went to one popular website and found that every day has more than one significant event marking it!

Some are cute, Aug 4 - Champagne Day also Picnic Day, Aug 6 - Pamper Yourself Day, Aug 8 - Happiness Happens Day.
Some wacky, Aug 3 - Grab Some Nuts Day, Aug 6 - Try Hypnosis Day and Wiggle Your Toes Day, Aug 10 - Lazy Day (love this one), Aug 16 - Roller Coaster Day and some just plain weird, Aug 2 - Mustard Day, Aug 5 - Blackmail Day, Aug 8 - Refrigerator Day to name just a few!

So guys go wish your fridge a happy day today before it loses its temper and floods your kitchen! After all even machines deserve a load of TLC ;-)

Oh and to all my friends (you know who you are!) "Happy Friendship Day, Week, Month and Year Always & Forever!!"

There that should cover me for life!

Ma'am I swallowed my tooth!

Recently, I had the opportunity to teach a bunch of 1st graders, thanks to a very dear friend Usha, who is a Grade 1 class-teacher in an International school here in Singapore.

They were learning about the human body and she thought it would be interesting to have me as guest speaker, me being a doctor and all! When she first asked if I could come and speak to the children a couple of months ago I must admit I was a bit nervous - but decided to 'boldly go where I had never gone before' (sorry couldn't resist the star trek ref) and so I said yes!

We agreed to keep it simple (they were after all only 6yr olds!) and settled for some interesting facts about the systems they knew and decided to show them some of the medical instruments doctors use while examining patients, the classic example being every one's favourite: the stethoscope!

On the day, I gathered my notes and instruments and headed over, feeling rather like a kid on his first day in a new school - nervously excited!! Got there half an hour early by design and the Principal was kind enough to show me around. It was nostalgic to say the least - I haven't been inside a school for oh...let me see...never mind, too many years to count ;-)

Enjoyed looking into the beautifully decorated lower-grade classrooms and the more austere higher-grade ones. Why do imagination and curiosity lose out to practicality as we grow older? Such a shame! Walking around the various labs, the cafeteria, the indoor gym, the library, was like a welcome blast from the past!

And then, it was time for class! I met the kids in their classroom where Usha introduced me as "Our Guest Speaker - the Doctor!" They all yelled "Good Morning Ma'am" in a chorus as I stood smiling, nervously self-conscious, aware they were all staring at me like some kind of interesting specimen, until a little boy piped up, "Are you a doctor really? You don't look like one? Your not even wearing doctor clothes!" Another little girl squirmed in her seat while frantically waving her hand around to attract my attention. "Yes," I said and she burst out "Ma'am you know, once I swallowed my tooth and now it's right down in my stomach!" I burst out laughing and all my nervousness vanished! This was going to be a hoot!

Welcome to the world of 6yr olds :-)

And so we began...all throughout the one hour, they fidgeted, talked out of turn and yelled out details of every injury and fracture they or their family members had ever suffered in the manner of all 6yr olds!! "Ma'am my grandpa's skull burst!" yelled one little boy and then seeing my shocked face - he went on to explain patiently "Ma'am he slipped and had a fracture in his head and had to go to hospital." Another little girl shared how her foot had been in plaster for 6 weeks and then her hand for 4 more, the poor darling I thought and then thought, her poor mother!! And all the while my friend from the classroom kept up her chorus, "Ma'am I swallowed my tooth and now it's in my tummy!" It was entertainingly surreal.

I showed them the stethoscope and thermometer and a syringe - all too familiar from visits to the doctor's clinic. They were fascinated by the otoscope that could 'see right into your ear.' "What's there to see inside the ear Ma'am? Is it red-coloured?" The hammer used to test reflexes interested them so much that while leaving, they had all made their own, by sticking their pencil points into one end of their erasers!! Smart kids these! They trooped out in a straggly line proudly showing off their handiwork. Moms please accept my apologies for ruining one more eraser - but what's one more in the hundreds that will follow! ;-)

The hour passed in a flash! While leaving, they presented me with 3 beautiful thank you cards that I will treasure always :-) I don't know how much of what they heard that day they will remember - but I know this I will never forget what they taught me - stay young, don't be afraid to ask questions, never limit your imagination and always listen to your teacher!

And so that was my first shot at teaching...entirely adorable, utterly exhausting and hugely satisfying!!

A big 'THANK YOU' to Usha and her 'bacchas' for giving me one of the happiest moments of my life!

Old friends...

I'm really into this blogging thing today! Have just finished editing another chapter and am so happy - have decided to spend more time blinding myself at the PC! Sometimes I wonder whether I would even have a life to write about if it weren't for my 'beloved laptop!' - my friend, my confidante and often my muse!!

So here I am with my evening cuppa, rice for dinner on the stove, getting this blog sorted!

Am posting the poems from my other blogs here in an attempt to get organized at the suggestion of my cousin Aseem. One because it was rational and second 'coz rational is so 'rare' from Aseem ;) (kidding bro! you are the best!)

And that's why I thought this title appropriate - because it felt like revisiting old friends. Every poem is special - bringing back treasured memories of joy and pain. Reading them is like slipping under my ancient, dog-eared comforter and curling up, safe from the madness of the crazy world outside! My oasis, my harbour, my sanctuary...just like old friends so often are...

Will start with my first, my precious, my oldest friend...Awakenings.

'Awakenings'

This is the first poem I ever wrote...

It was just after watching the movie of the same title, starring one my all-time favourites Robert DeNiro. The movie is based on a true story of what happens when long-term comatose patients start waking up after they receive a revolutionary drug.

A poignantly beautiful movie about the fragility of life, it got me thinking about how they must have felt, when they awoke to a 'Whole New World' & where they might have been during all those years of silent vigil.

I don't know why I've been thinking about it today - maybe it has something to do with 'The Year of the Rat' and new beginnings or the fact I will turn 40 this year, or the fact that we are waiting for our Baby to arrive, or all of the above! Or maybe it's just my gut telling me, 2008 - is truly the year of my Awakening!

Awakenings

What is my cage?
If not of bars, of thoughts,
Of words, of dreams.
What is it that keeps me from myself,
If not a cage.

What is it that brings me joy?
Helps me fly, touch the sky.
Keeps me from drowning, keeps me afloat,
A touch of sunlight, a ray of hope.

Where is my soul if not within,
And is my heart in perfect sync?
My mind, it soars,
My eyes, they bore,
Into the future and the past,
Until I am at peace at last.

- Harsha

'Father Time'

I honestly don't remember how this next one came to me!

Wish I could say it evolved from some intellectual thought process or better yet - arrived fully formed into my head like manna from heaven! The fact is, haven't a clue - vaguely remember thinking 'rhyming's a bitch!'

So here He is 'Father Time.' Be careful he won't stay long...

'Father Time'

Sometimes it’s hard to know,
If ‘Time’ is friend or hateful foe.
Racing along when he should walk slow,
Standing still when he needs to flow.

He’s ‘Father’, he’s money,
And sometimes just funny!
Laughing, crying. angry, sad,
And at times, just plain bad.

He has his own energy, walks his own pace,
While men run his awkward race.
Some with passion, some with grace,
Some with red and puffy face!

He has a mind all his own,
To terrorize, humble, soothe or clone.
No beginnings, never ends,
Worst of enemies, best of friends.

He pays no heed to human emotions,
Traveling along in his own motion.
Raising mountains, filling oceans,
Watching the rise and fall of nations.

Does he mend broken hearts, and heal broken bones?
Or maybe turn men to stone?
He turns tiny seeds into giant trees,
And then cuts them down with scary ease.

He can be as gentle as a baby’s breath,
Or cold and hard, still as death.
How might we stop him, make him care?
To solve his riddle, who would dare?


- Harsha

'Silent Night'

I wrote this one late one night, when for a change, I wasn't sprawled in front of the TV watching inane hindi serials!

Instead I allowed silence to envelop me in its magical embrace and took a leap of faith.

And so now I truly believe...Silence is golden...

'Silent Night'

I sit silent in the night,
Watching the starry skies.
It’s a beautiful still night,
And the world it seems is quietly resting...

But Mother Nature works on...
Softly swaying trees, reaching ever upward to the sky,
Rustling leaves singing songs to the wind,
Sleepy flowers dreaming of a fruitful tomorrow,
Deep roots, drawing their strength from the depths of the earth,
Travelling farther from home each day.
The night brings them no rest...

Far away the stars shine brightly,
Hurling flames of fire into space,
The moon appears calm and serene,
But what do we know of the upheavals on her face?
I spot Mars, but a red dot in the sky,
How far away he is and yet how closely he seems to watch!
The night brings them no rest...

All over the world there is a hush of peace,
Babies sleep while parents watch,
Parents sleep while babies dream,
Until a cry or dream awakes them both,
And starts again their cycle of life.
The night brings them no rest...

The force works silently through the night,
The heartbeat of this sleeping world,
Moving mountains, flooding rivers,
Carrying hope, spreading seeds,
Bringing moonshine and dreamless sleep,
Come morning, it brings us Joy,
New possibilities to enjoy,
Faith and Hope
Grief and Joy

All through the silent night,
This force of LIFE, keeps us alive.

- Harsha

'Music'

A dear friend of mine organized a dance festival a while ago that showcased Indian Contemporary Dance. It was my first serious exposure to the madly chaotic yet strangely serene world of creative arts - and I enjoyed every loony minute of it!!

I've always had a secret yearning to be creative in the way great artists and authors and dancers are. Creation is mystical to me - often mundane always magical!

The festival allowed me to interact closely with artists practicing their art of dance and I came away impressed by their dedication, moved by their courage, mesemerized by their passion. They seemed normal enough during the day, but on stage at night, they were transformed into mystical beings, lost in their world of song and dance, oblivious to us mere mortals fated only to watch.

I come from a family that loves music and the amalgamation of music and dance at the festival made me think of the music in our everyday lives and inspired me to write this next poem...

'Music'

Music is all around...

In raindrops falling soft and light,
Or thunderstorms, crackling bright,
In the quick march of army boots,
And the low notes of a night owl’s hoot.

In the pitter-patter of little feet,
In the silence of a golden sleep,
Dreams unleash their silent beats,
Music dwells in every heartbeat.

In a baby’s cry and a mother’s sigh,
On quivering lips and mountains high,
In a lover’s song and the temple gong,
Loud and clear, pure and strong.

In the timeless changing of seasons,
And sometimes, for no good reason!
All around us music plays,
In lullabies and ‘Amazing Grace'.

From swaying trees and rustling leaves,
In the trickle of water before the freeze,
Or wafting by on an ocean breeze,
Music brings a sweet release.

Through the gay abandon of letting go,
In the eyes of parents, all aglow,
In the laughter of children and magic of song,
All around us music abounds.

In the maddening chatter of teenage voice,
Where old friends gather and rejoice,
In nostalgic melodies and modern rhymes,
Music takes us, on a journey through time.

In a beautiful dancer’s form and grace,
Music claims eternal space,
Swaying hips and tapping feet,
Moving to the rhythm of soulful beats.

Over and under, inside and out,
Whisper, holler, yell and shout,
Can’t escape it, won’t let go,
Makes spirits sing and passion flow.

In the stillness of morning and calmness of dawn,
Lie infinite beginnings of magical songs.
Conquering boredom, softening thorn,
In every moment, music is born.

- Harsha

Happiness Journal...

I first heard this idea on Oprah! Elizabeth Gilbert the author of Eat, Pray, Love (one of my favourite books) was a guest on the show and she was talking about how at the end of each day, she wrote down her happiest moment. She joked about how it helped her let go of all the million little crappy moments that crammed her day!!

I loved the idea!! Isn't it wonderful to have something happy to hold on to at the end of a long hard day? How many times have I held on to those crappy moments and forgotten the happy ones? Too often that's for sure! So this is my way of holding on to those moments that have brought me joy.

Not all of them will be earth-shatteringly 'Titanic' scale happy but that doesn't matter! So often I find joy in the tiny seemingly insignificant details...the bus I caught in the nick of time, an early cuppa that has miraculously turned out just right (believe me even black coffee is tough to get right on some bleary-eyed mornings!), getting a cab in the pouring rain, a good book...the list goes on.

The other reason is that I wanted to get back to writing again. I loved it as a child (way back when!) and was not bad at it or so I was led to believe ;-) I recently started working with a very dear friend as an editor and am enjoying it immensely! It has brought back all the joy associated with books in general (always LOVED them) and writing in particular.

And so here I go...wish me luck!

It's 11.42am and my happiest moment for the day so far has been starting this blog! Have been putting it off for so long - I feel fantastic at having finally done it! Took me all of 5 min to actually get started too! Isn't it weird how the things you think are most difficult seem like a piece of cake once you get started? It happens to me all the time - I procrastinate endlessly until a looming deadline scares the hell out me and then turn into a hysterical maniac!! I blame it on good old laziness and also the fact that I'm convinced I do my best work under pressure! True as that might be, it's terribly stressful. But this journal is not about resolutions - so I won't make any...yet!

Another happy moment - took a mid-week break from the gym and have managed not to stuff myself all morning while working! An achievement worthy of the Nobel Prize in Restraint!!